Sunday 10 July 2016


May 13, 2016

A few things to mention:

First, I once again have not been blogging. No excuses, I just haven't done it. I had every intention to blog every day in April. I didn't.

Second, I have officially been on a week vacation before my maternity leave starts. It's day five, and I cannot figure out how I made it through a day of work without a nap. I can't make it through a day at home without a nap.

At my last appointment before being induced. 38 weeks.

Next, I'm trying so very hard to think of things I've done in life with no fear. Or things that I feared, but I did anyway. Most of them include travel. I went out and discovered the world (or parts of it). It's not the same thing.

The point is: I'm scared. Scared of birth, scared of being a mom. Basically scared of all of it.

I had my weekly doctor's appointment on Monday, and my doctor and I were talking about when I'd be induced. We were talking about the 17th when she looked over and said, "Unless you'd like to be induced this week?"

I freaked out. I said no because as soon as she said it, I realised, I wasn't ready.

In all reality, am I going to be more ready next week than I am this week?

In the past, I've been good at jumping in. If something is scary, I do it. That's the only way to get through it. You just get it over with, and it's worked for me. Things have turned out well with this approach.

July 10: I'm about to press publish, and share this. It's basically unfinished, but it's how I was feeling right before baby. This blog has sat here for a very long time. I'm going to publish this post as is, and then work on the next update. Hopefully it won't sit unfinished for two plus months.  

"Write it on your heart that every day is the best day in the year."
Ralph Waldo Emerson

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  1. As you've likely already discovered, one fear disappears to be replaced by a thousand more, but one smile can make up for a thousand anxious thoughts and doubts...welcome to motherhood :-) Can't wait to read more about your adventures with Anthony!

    1. Thanks. :) I'm loving it. (When he's healthy!)